When kids start out we reward them for all their milestones. We reward them for their first steps by giving praise or potty training(by giving treats). Does it matter that one child learned to walk a month before another? Does it matter that one child stopped having accidents before another? It does not as we are all on different levels.
I have coached and fostered kids who have had not been rewarded for those milestones. Those kids lacked confidence and the ability to challenge themselves. I start by telling them the only thing I expect from them is maximum effort. Then from there I set obtainable goals for that child. For one kid it may be getting 3 rebounds for another it may be taking(not making but taking) a shot. When the game is on the line I challenge all the kids to give it their all. Its hard for kids to see the reward in obtaining a personal goal. So that participation trophy helps just like the pee pee candy does when a kids goes potty. Win or lose you set a goal and you worked towards that goal.
I have run 3 half marathons, three 10ks, four 8ks and 6 or so 5ks. I have not won any of them. Although I did come in 3rd in one 10k in my age group(humble brag). I don't run to win I run to stay healthy. A way to keep my blood pressure in line with out taking daily medication. Then it became a challenge. If I can run 3 miles then I can run 6. If I can run 6 miles I can run 13. Then it became can I run 3 miles in under 30 mins. I found different ways to challenge and push myself. By achieving those goals I won. That is what needs to be taught to kids. If you teach them there is no reward unless you are the best then they wont try.
This mind set goes beyond sports. Kids need to be taught to set goals in life. So that when they are adults they will set goals that matter. Such as education goals. I am going to get a certification to get that promotion at work. I am going to finish my undergrad or get a masters. Financial goals. I am going to save for a trip. I am going save up for a down payment on a house. The reward in those cases are clear.
Winning at life does not mean you are the richest or have the most stuff. It means you have achieved the goals you set for yourself. This should be taught to kids. The ultimate prize is not always first place or a trophy.
But what do I know.
Wednesday, August 19, 2015
Monday, March 4, 2013
Hoosiers Any One
On Saturday Christopher had his basketball tournament. Because I was coaching an 11-13 year old team(the Knicks) Christopher played up as he is only 9 years old. We were tied for second in a four team league. So we played the team we were tied with in the first round. Even though we only had 6 players we were able to pull out a win which set up the championship game against the the Warriors. We lost to the Warriors twice in the regular season by more than 20 points both times. The Warriors were a bigger team and had more depth. We did not want to run with them. Talking with the other coaches before the game we all agreed we would be happy with a 10-9 game. Our plan was to pressure the ball and slow down the tempo of the game. Our game plan worked to perfection. With 6 players all who played heavily in the first game we were only down by 1 at half time 27-28. A few poor turn overs late in the 3rd quarter however gave the Warriors a 10 point lead. Our kids never gave up. After the 10 point lead we cranked up the defense and started playing applying full court pressure. We cut the lead to 4 points with 28 seconds to go. After a Warriors turnover we we hit a 3 pointer to make it a 1 point game with about 18 seconds to. We were not able to get possession back and the final score was 54-55. Heavily out numbered(the Warriors dressed 11) severely out sized( only 2 of the 11 players for the Warriors were shorter than the Knicks tallest player) our team fought hard and never gave up. I was so proud of every player on our team. Here is a picture of the two teams after the game. The Warriors are in black and the Knicks in blue.
Thursday, February 21, 2013
Banner Elk
Cold
Cold
Cold
Carly and I had been saying for a long time that would were going to the mountains to let the kids ski and play in the snow. This year we finally did it. We rented a nice condo at Echota on the Ridge. The condo was laid out nice and had wonderful views of the mountain and the valley below. There was even a TV in the master bathroom.
Friday was an early release day from school so we got on the road by 3pm. It is a nice easy drive from Raleigh to Banner Elk right outside of Boone. We hit a little traffic on the other side of Winston Salem. It was 60 degrees and sunny when we left Raleigh. By the time we got to Boone is was 30 degrees and a winter mix was falling. Echota on the Ridge is a new community so it was not in the car's GPS so we had to use my phone(good ole android) for the directions. Well it got us there but it took the scenic route up the mountain. I would find out later that going down the back side of the was less than a mile opposed to almost 3 miles on the front side. I must tell you driving up a mountain at night is no fun.
The gas light came on as we were going up the mountain so after unpacking the car i headed to get gas. Found a gas station not too far from the condo. Walked around about 5 minutes before i finally asked the cashier where the beer was. Come to find out they were dry because they just outside the city limits. Luckily there was a grocery store about 4 miles up the road and I was able to get beer and wine for the night.
The rain from Friday night did finally turn to snow and the temperature dropped. The high was about 20 degrees. So we bundled up and headed to Beech Mountain for some sledding. The Banner Elk Chamber of Commerce maintains a sledding hill on top of Beech Mountain. I must say it was pretty fun. We sledded for over two hours and no one complained about being cold even though the temperture was in the low 20s.
We got up early on Sunday morning and had breakfast and headed out. Well it would seem the plows did not get up early because coming down the mountain was interesting to say the least.
We made it down the mountain without any issues. However when we started going up Beech Mountain (elv 5000 ft) There were flashing signs saying if you don' shave 4x4 or snow chains don't think about it. We did not drive my car because if the roads were bad enough to need a chains and all wheel drive I wanted no part of slidding down a mountain. So we turned around and headed to Sugar Mountain. Getting to Sugar was much easier. We made it in time to get Christopher checked and and ready to ski school. Christopher said he wanted to snowboard and I thought I signed him up for snowboarding. Well I did not. I signed him up for ski lessons. When we came back to check on him around lunch he did not look happy. And it had nothing to do with the fact that it was 11 degrees on Sunday. Yes 11.....
So we left Christopher to his lessons and the 11 degree temps and got lunch at the Ski Lodge. Now from what I had always heard there was suppose to be this big fireplace with couches. I saw none of that. It was a big dinning hall with terrible food and lots of rude people. After lunch we went back to the car to let the girls take a nap(and us too). We were really expecting a call saying to come pick Christopher up because he had had enough.
I headed back to the ski school around 230 to watch the last couple of minutes of ski school. When I got there I was looking all around the bunny slopes but he was no where to be found. Finally around 3 I walk up to the chair lift and here comes Christopher and he two(female) ski instructors off the mountain. He is smiling ear to ear. His ski instructor tells me they moved him up a level or two and they went down the mountain a few times. He started the day a beginner 1 and ended a beginner 3. He was able to get on and off the chair lift and ski down the mountain. So I took him over to the bunny slopes so I could see for myself. There have not been many more times in his life that I have been more impressed with him. He looked so in control and confident going down the bunnies on his own. The bunny slopes were pretty crowded and he was able to maneuver threw the falling people with ease. The night before we made reservations at Hawksnest to tube at 4pm. So even though we had the ski rentals until 430 another hour and half we had to go. What I did not know was Hawknest called and cancelled the reservation. My phone was dieing and I left it in the car. So I said that Christopher had to ski on Monday. That in itself is huge. I never plan activities for the day we are headed home. But after seeing him on the sloped I knew we had to bring him back.
On Monday morning we got up had breakfast and packed up the car and headed to Beech Mountain so Christopher and Carly could ski before we headed back.
It was a great trip.
Did I mention it was 11 degrees on Sunday.
Cold
Cold
Cold
Cold
Cold
Carly and I had been saying for a long time that would were going to the mountains to let the kids ski and play in the snow. This year we finally did it. We rented a nice condo at Echota on the Ridge. The condo was laid out nice and had wonderful views of the mountain and the valley below. There was even a TV in the master bathroom.
Friday was an early release day from school so we got on the road by 3pm. It is a nice easy drive from Raleigh to Banner Elk right outside of Boone. We hit a little traffic on the other side of Winston Salem. It was 60 degrees and sunny when we left Raleigh. By the time we got to Boone is was 30 degrees and a winter mix was falling. Echota on the Ridge is a new community so it was not in the car's GPS so we had to use my phone(good ole android) for the directions. Well it got us there but it took the scenic route up the mountain. I would find out later that going down the back side of the was less than a mile opposed to almost 3 miles on the front side. I must tell you driving up a mountain at night is no fun.
The gas light came on as we were going up the mountain so after unpacking the car i headed to get gas. Found a gas station not too far from the condo. Walked around about 5 minutes before i finally asked the cashier where the beer was. Come to find out they were dry because they just outside the city limits. Luckily there was a grocery store about 4 miles up the road and I was able to get beer and wine for the night.
The rain from Friday night did finally turn to snow and the temperature dropped. The high was about 20 degrees. So we bundled up and headed to Beech Mountain for some sledding. The Banner Elk Chamber of Commerce maintains a sledding hill on top of Beech Mountain. I must say it was pretty fun. We sledded for over two hours and no one complained about being cold even though the temperture was in the low 20s.
After sledding on we went back to the condo to relax and thaw out. With plans of getting up early on Sunday morning to take Christopher to ski school for the day
We got up early on Sunday morning and had breakfast and headed out. Well it would seem the plows did not get up early because coming down the mountain was interesting to say the least.
We made it down the mountain without any issues. However when we started going up Beech Mountain (elv 5000 ft) There were flashing signs saying if you don' shave 4x4 or snow chains don't think about it. We did not drive my car because if the roads were bad enough to need a chains and all wheel drive I wanted no part of slidding down a mountain. So we turned around and headed to Sugar Mountain. Getting to Sugar was much easier. We made it in time to get Christopher checked and and ready to ski school. Christopher said he wanted to snowboard and I thought I signed him up for snowboarding. Well I did not. I signed him up for ski lessons. When we came back to check on him around lunch he did not look happy. And it had nothing to do with the fact that it was 11 degrees on Sunday. Yes 11.....
So we left Christopher to his lessons and the 11 degree temps and got lunch at the Ski Lodge. Now from what I had always heard there was suppose to be this big fireplace with couches. I saw none of that. It was a big dinning hall with terrible food and lots of rude people. After lunch we went back to the car to let the girls take a nap(and us too). We were really expecting a call saying to come pick Christopher up because he had had enough.
I headed back to the ski school around 230 to watch the last couple of minutes of ski school. When I got there I was looking all around the bunny slopes but he was no where to be found. Finally around 3 I walk up to the chair lift and here comes Christopher and he two(female) ski instructors off the mountain. He is smiling ear to ear. His ski instructor tells me they moved him up a level or two and they went down the mountain a few times. He started the day a beginner 1 and ended a beginner 3. He was able to get on and off the chair lift and ski down the mountain. So I took him over to the bunny slopes so I could see for myself. There have not been many more times in his life that I have been more impressed with him. He looked so in control and confident going down the bunnies on his own. The bunny slopes were pretty crowded and he was able to maneuver threw the falling people with ease. The night before we made reservations at Hawksnest to tube at 4pm. So even though we had the ski rentals until 430 another hour and half we had to go. What I did not know was Hawknest called and cancelled the reservation. My phone was dieing and I left it in the car. So I said that Christopher had to ski on Monday. That in itself is huge. I never plan activities for the day we are headed home. But after seeing him on the sloped I knew we had to bring him back.
On Monday morning we got up had breakfast and packed up the car and headed to Beech Mountain so Christopher and Carly could ski before we headed back.
It was a great trip.
Did I mention it was 11 degrees on Sunday.
Cold
Cold
Cold
Sunday, January 13, 2013
Helicat Launch
Almost three years after space camp Christopher and I finally launched a model rocket. I had promised for awhile that we would build and launch a rocket. So last week we went to Hi-Tech Hobbies in Triangle Towne Center. There were a lot of cool toys in Hi-Tech. We both fell in love with the remote control Lambo but not the $600 price tag. They only had three rockets to choose from. Christopher chose the Helicat. Once launched the nose of the rocket has propellers that deploy and it spins back to earth. The body of the rocket has a parachute that helps it glide back to the ground.
We were going to try and launch at Dillard Drive Elementary across the street but a group of guys where playing a game of flag football. So we decided to head over to Dorothea Dix soccer fields to launch. Well the soccer fields were all filled. Luckily there was a large enough field behind the field. All the material I read said you need an open space at least 500 sq ft. The open field provided enough space. Worse case the chute would carry the body onto the soccer field.
We get everything set up and it is time to launch. My goal was to let Christopher launch but he was having trouble holding both the safety key and the launch button at the same time. So I had to launch. I also forgot to give him the camera so he could record the launch. So we were both standing in awe as the rocket took off. I was able to catch the rocket nose and body with the shoot coming back to the ground. The wind actually took the body with the chute just short of the soccer field a good 800 ft away. Not sure how high the rocket got but it was high enough for both of us to go crazy.
We are already talking about ordering new rockets. I can not wait until we launch again.
Thursday, October 4, 2012
Who Knew I Would Like Hunting
As much as I was dreading the Disney trip. I did have a good time. And along the way I found a way to have some fun with it. So many photo ops with all these nice looking young ladies. Who does not like to get their picture taken with a nice looking young lady. Then I found out they have a name for this; Princess hunting. I did get sided tracked along the way but I did find a few princes's to take a picture with me.
Monday, October 1, 2012
Maiden Voyage
Sunday was the first time I took the new boat out on the lake. Actually it was the first time I took any boat out on the lake. I had not pulled a trailer since I was a crop scout after my freshman year at State. That did not go so well as I jackknifed the trailer several times.
There was only a small misstep with getting the boat off the trailer. I unhooked the traps(and put the plug back in) in the rear but did not unhook the hull strap. So after unhooking the strap the boat was in the water. My first mate and I then set out to find a nice spot to chill for the afternoon.
After riding around for a few minutes we found a nice little a spot and decided to drop anchor. Out of all the things I thought I would have trouble with dropping anchor was not one. I had no issues backing the trailer into the water. No issues getting the boat off the trailer. But getting that anchor in the ground never happened. I must have thrown that thing 10 times. Finally gave up and just dropped it. Not a big deal as we really did not drift a lot.
I packed a few sandwiches and snacks so it was time to have lunch. Sitting on the water and each lunch was great. Nice quite and relaxing.
I have never claimed to be a fisherman. I will sit and hold a rod and a beer. That was very evident when there were no real fisherman around. The line for both our poles kept getting tangled. I must have redone the line on them both 5 or 6 times. I am going to have to take my first mate out with some one who actually knows how to fish.
After being out on the boat for almost 4 hours it was time to head back. I thought for sure we only made 1 turn. Well I was wrong. It took us about 10 mins to find our way back to the boat ramp. I must invest in a GPS system or find a good app.
I just had the hitch installed on the truck the day I picked the boat up. The trailer has 5 prongs, something about an active braking system. Well the truck is only wired for 4. So when I picked up the boat the guy told me a work around. It involved having the head lights on. So when I pulled the truck out of the water I left the lights on. 4 hours later the battery was dead. Luckily I had my jumper cables in the back. After jumping the truck I had no problem getting the boat back on the trailer and back to storage.
It was a great first day on the boat.
There was only a small misstep with getting the boat off the trailer. I unhooked the traps(and put the plug back in) in the rear but did not unhook the hull strap. So after unhooking the strap the boat was in the water. My first mate and I then set out to find a nice spot to chill for the afternoon.
After riding around for a few minutes we found a nice little a spot and decided to drop anchor. Out of all the things I thought I would have trouble with dropping anchor was not one. I had no issues backing the trailer into the water. No issues getting the boat off the trailer. But getting that anchor in the ground never happened. I must have thrown that thing 10 times. Finally gave up and just dropped it. Not a big deal as we really did not drift a lot.
I packed a few sandwiches and snacks so it was time to have lunch. Sitting on the water and each lunch was great. Nice quite and relaxing.
I have never claimed to be a fisherman. I will sit and hold a rod and a beer. That was very evident when there were no real fisherman around. The line for both our poles kept getting tangled. I must have redone the line on them both 5 or 6 times. I am going to have to take my first mate out with some one who actually knows how to fish.
After being out on the boat for almost 4 hours it was time to head back. I thought for sure we only made 1 turn. Well I was wrong. It took us about 10 mins to find our way back to the boat ramp. I must invest in a GPS system or find a good app.
I just had the hitch installed on the truck the day I picked the boat up. The trailer has 5 prongs, something about an active braking system. Well the truck is only wired for 4. So when I picked up the boat the guy told me a work around. It involved having the head lights on. So when I pulled the truck out of the water I left the lights on. 4 hours later the battery was dead. Luckily I had my jumper cables in the back. After jumping the truck I had no problem getting the boat back on the trailer and back to storage.
It was a great first day on the boat.
Thursday, June 21, 2012
Right is Right and ....
Right is right and wrong is wrong is something my mom used to say as a kid. Basically it means there are no grey areas. Something is either right or wrong. By now I am sure you have seen the video of the school bus monitor being tormented by 12 and 13 year old boys. Some of the things said to this woman was just heartless. I am not sure how any one I don't care how old thought it would be ok to say those things to anyone. Karen Klein the monitor was taking everything the little shits had to say until they said that all her family killed themselves because they did not want to be around her. The kids said this not knowing that Klein had lost someone in the last couple of years. I don't care to think what these children have been lacking in their short lives that would make them think what they did to this poor lady was funny. If that were my mother or grandmother I can not imagine what I would want to do to those kids and their parents. What those kids did was wrong bottom line. These kids have to learn that you can not treat people like this. Ms. Klein says she does not want this kids to be charged criminally but a good grounding would be just fine. For some odd reason I just don't think grounding is enough in this situation. As it seems as if they have never really been taught a lesson in life. I think this is a good time to learn what my mom used to tell me. Right is right and wrong is wrong. This lesson should stick with them for the rest of their lives.
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